On Thursday morning, Bunce and the others had finished breakfast and were about to head to Snape's basement for Potions.
As soon as they entered the classroom, Snape said lazily,"Sit properly, quickly sit properly."
Today, they were making a new drug: Shrinking solution. A few seats away from Bunce, Neville was in trouble. Neville was always having a nervous breakdown in Potions, partly because of himself, but mostly because he was so afraid of Snape. His potion was supposed to be a bright green acidic substance, but instead-
"Orange, Longbottom." said Snape, spooning some out and letting it splash back into the cauldron so everyone could see it. "Orange. Tell me, child, has something penetrated this thick skull of yours? Didn't you hear me say, very clearly, that all I needed was a drop of rat bile? Did I not make it clear that a little leech juice would be enough? How can I make you understand, Longbottom?”
Neville's face was pink and he was shaking. He looked like he was on the verge of tears.
"Sir," said Hermione,"if you'll allow me, sir, may I correct it for him?"”
"I didn't ask you to show off, Miss Granger.”said Snape coldly, and Hermione went as red as Neville. "Longbottom, we're going to feed your toad a few drops of this potion before class ends today and see what happens. Perhaps this will encourage you to make this potion well.”
Snape walked away, leaving Neville, terrified.
"Help me!" he moaned at Hermione.
"Hey, Harry," said Seamus Finnigan, turning to borrow Harry's brass scales. The Daily Prophet this morning-they think Sirius Black's been marked.”
"Where is it?" said Harry and Ron quickly.
"Not far from here." said Seamus excitedly."It was a Muggle who saw him. Of course, she didn't really know. Muggles think he's just a common criminal, don't they? So she called the hot line. He was long gone by the time the Ministry arrived.”
"Not too far from here," repeated Ron.
"Don't think too much. He's not worth worrying about.”Bangs stood up and said.
"But he wanted to kill Harry," said Ron.
"Which eye of yours saw it?" Bangs said as he washed his hands in the stone sink.
Snape approached Neville, who was cowering next to his cauldron, as the end of the lesson was about to begin.
"Gather around, everyone," said Snape, his black eyes shining."Let's see what happens to Longbottom's toad. If he made a shrinking potion, his toad would shrink into a tadpole. If he had done wrong, and I have no doubt about that, the toad would have been poisoned.”
the Gryffindors watched in horror; The Slytherins watched excitedly, Bunce yawned. Snape held Trevor the Toad in his left hand and dropped a small spoon into Neville's potion, which was now green. He poured a few drops down Trevor's throat.
There was a moment of silence. Ralph was panting heavily. There was a soft pop, and Trevor the tadpole was wriggling in Snape's palm.
The Gryffindors clapped. Snape looked sour. He pulled a small bottle from the pocket of his robes and poured a few drops on Trevor, who suddenly reappeared as a fully grown toad.
"Five points from Gryffindor," said Snape, wiping away the smiles. "I told you not to help him, Miss Granger. Class dismissed."
Ron was still excited about Snape when Bunce, Harry, Ron, and Hermione climbed the stairs into the front hall.
"Five points from Gryffindor, just because that potion was right! Why didn't you lie, Hermione? You should say Neville did it himself!”said Ron slobbering.
Hermione did not answer. Ron looked around.
"Where did she go?"
"He left." Bance said. Now they stood at the top of the stairs, watching the rest of the class pass by them toward the hall for lunch.
"She was just behind us.”said Ron, frowning.
"She's there." said Harry.
Hermione, panting slightly, hurried up the stairs; She grabbed her bag with one hand and seemed to be stuffing something under the front of her robes with the other.
"How did you do that?" asked Ron.
"What?" said Hermione, continuing to walk with them.
"One minute you were behind us, and now you're at the bottom of the stairs.”
"What?" Hermione looked a little confused."Oh-I've got to go back and get my stuff. Oh no "
Hermione's bag cracked. Bunce was not surprised; he could see at least a dozen large, heavy books in her bag.
"Why do you carry so many books with you?”asked Ron.
"Do you know how many classes I have to attend?”said Hermione breathlessly.”
"Sure, but" said Ron, flipping through the books she had handed him and reading the covers,"you don't have to take those classes today. There was only Defense Against the Dark Arts this afternoon.”
"Oh, yes." said Hermione vaguely, but she put all her books back in her bag. "I hope there's something good for lunch, I'm starving.”she added, and she strode off into the hall.
"Don't you think Hermione's hiding something from us?”said Ron.
"Even if there is, it's not something you should be concerned about.”Bance said.
When they arrived at Professor Lupin's first Defense Against the Dark Arts class, Lupin was not there. They all sat down and took out their books, quills, and parchment; They were talking when Lupin finally entered the classroom. Lupin smiled and set his battered suitcase down on the desk. He was as ragged as he had been when he had arrived, but looked healthier than he had on the train, perhaps because he had had a few solid meals.
"Good afternoon," he said."Please put your books back in your bags." Today is a practical lesson. You only need wands.”
The class put their books back in their bags, and a few students exchanged looks of surprise. They had never had a practical Defense Against the Dark Arts lesson, except for that memorable one last year, in which their former teacher had brought a cage of goblins and let them all out.
"So," said the Professor, seeing that everyone was ready,"will you follow me?"”
Baffled but interested, the class rose to their feet and followed Professor Lupin out of the classroom. He led them down the deserted corridor and around a corner. There, the first thing they saw was Peeves the Teasing Ghost, floating upside down in midair and stuffing gum into the nearest keyhole.
It was not until Professor Lupin was two feet away from Peeves that he looked up, then wiggled his curled toes and began to sing.
"Dumb, stupid Lupin," sang Peeves."Dumb, stupid Lupin, stupid, stupid Lupin-"
Peeves was always rude and unruly, but he usually had some respect for teachers. Everyone turned quickly to the Professor to see what he would do. To their surprise, he was still smiling.
"If I were you, Peeves, I'd take the gum out of the keyhole," said Lupin happily."Mr. Filch won't be able to get his broom.”
Filch was the caretaker of Hogwarts, a bad-tempered, failed wizard who was always at odds with his students and Peeves. Peeves, however, ignored Professor Lupin's words and blew out a loud wet raspberry.
Professor Lupin sighed slightly and took out his wand.
"It's a useful little spell," he said, turning to the class."Watch this."”
He raised his wand to shoulder level and said,"Wadi Wasi!" Then he pointed at Peeves.
The piece of gum shot out of the keyhole like a bullet and into Peeves's left nostrils; Peeves swerved away at once and rose straight up, cursing as he went.
"Excellent, sir!" said Dean Thomas in surprise.
"Thank you, Dean." said Professor Lupin, putting away his wand again. "Shall we continue?"
They went down again, and the class looked at the shabbily dressed professor with increased respect. He led them down a second corridor and stopped, just outside the staffroom.
"Please enter." said Professor Lupin, opening the door and taking a step back.
The teachers 'lounge was a long room filled with old chairs that didn't fit together. There was only one teacher there. Professor Snape was sitting in a low armchair, looking around as the class entered. His eyes lit up and a mocking smile hung on his lips. As Professor Lupin entered and closed the door behind him, Snape said,"Don't close it, Lupin. It's better if I don't look at it." He got to his feet and walked past the class, his black robe billowing behind him. When they reached the porch, he turned and said,"Lupin, you may not have been warned, but Neville Longbottom is in this class. I advise you not to ask him to do anything difficult unless Miss Granger whispers instructions in his ear.”
Neville was blushing. Professor Lupin raised his eyebrows.
"I was hoping Neville would be my assistant for the first part," he said."I'm sure he'll do well.”
Neville was redder now, if he could. Snape's lips curled, but he left, slamming the door behind him.
"Now, this," said Professor Lupin, beckoning the class to the end of the lounge. There was nothing there except an old wardrobe where the staff kept their surplus robes. Professor Lupin stopped next to the wardrobe, which suddenly began to sway and bang against the wall.
"Don't worry." said Professor Lupin calmly, as several students jumped back in fright. "It's just a boggart in there,"
Most people felt that there was indeed a need to worry. Neville glanced at Professor Lupin, his eyes full of terror, and Seamus Finnigan peeked fearfully at the now wobbling handle of the cupboard.
"The boggart likes dark, enclosed spaces," said Professor Lupin."Wardrobes, the space under the bed, the cupboard under the sink-I once came across one hidden in an old grandfather clock. This one was moved in yesterday afternoon, and I asked the headmaster if the staff could leave it alone and give my third years some practice.
"So the first question we have to ask ourselves is, what is a boggart?”
Hermione raised her hand.
"It's a shapeshifter," she said."It can assume any form it thinks will most frighten us.”
"I couldn't say it better myself," said Professor Lupin, and Hermione looked pleased."So the boggart sitting in the dark in the wardrobe hasn't taken any form yet. It still didn't know what could scare the people outside the door. Nobody knows what a boggart looks like when he's alone, but when I let him out, he'll become the thing that scares all of us the most.”
"That means," said Professor Lupin, ignoring Neville's small, horrible voice,"that we have a great advantage over the boggart before we begin. Have you found the advantage, Harry?”
Hermione, who was sitting next to Harry, was jumping up and down on her tiptoes, her hand up again.
"Oh-because there were so many of us, it didn't know what it was supposed to be, did it?”said Harry hesitantly.
"Exactly." said Professor Lupin, and Hermione dropped her hand, looking slightly disappointed. "The best way to deal with boggarts is to have a lot of people. It was confused. What should it become? Was it a headless corpse or a carnivorous slug? I once saw a boggart make the mistake of trying to scare two people at once, so he turned himself into half a slug, which wasn't scary at all.”
"The spell to repel the boggart is simple, but it requires willpower. You know, what really scared the boggart off was laughter. All you have to do is force it into what you think is ridiculous.”
"Let's practice this spell without wands first. Please tell me comical!"
"Funny, funny!" The whole class said in unison.
"Good," said Professor Lupin,"very good. However, this was probably only the easy part. You know, this spell is not enough. It's up to you, Neville."
The wardrobe was shaking again, but not as much as Neville, who looked as though he was about to be hanged as he walked on.
"Now, Neville, relax," said Professor Lupin. Tell me, what are you most afraid of in this world?”
Neville's lips moved, but no sound came out.
"I didn't hear you, sorry, Neville.”said Professor Lupin happily.
Neville looked around eagerly, as though hoping to ask for help, then said in a whisper,"Professor Snape,"
Almost everyone laughed, even Neville himself grinned apologetically. Professor Lupin, however, looked thoughtful.
"Professor Snape. Well, Neville, I suppose you live with your grandmother?”
"Er-yes," said Neville nervously,"but-I don't want the boggart to look like her.”
" No, no, you misunderstood me," Professor Lupin said with a smile."I don't know. Can you tell us what kind of clothes your grandmother usually wears?”
Neville looked startled, but said,"Well, always wearing the same hat. It was the kind that was tall with an old eagle specimen on top. She also wore a long green dress and sometimes a fox skin scarf.”
"There's another bag, isn't there?" Professor Lupin encouraged him.
"A big red handbag." said Neville.
"Well," said Professor Lupin,"can you make a good copy of these clothes, Neville? Can you see these clothes in your head?”
"Yes, I can." replied Neville blankly, clearly unsure of what was going to happen next.
"When the boggart bursts out of the wardrobe, Neville, and sees your hand, it'll take on the appearance of Professor Snape.”Lupin said."And you, you're going to pick up your wand-like this-and shout 'ludicrous'-and try to concentrate on your grandmother's clothes. If all went well, Professor Snape would be forced to transform into a man wearing a hat with a stuffed eagle on it, dressed in green, and carrying a large red handbag.”
The whole class laughed, and the wardrobe shook even more violently.
"If Neville succeeds, this boggart might turn his attention to each of you in turn.”said Professor Lupin."Now, I want each of you to take a moment to think about what you fear the most, and imagine how you might force it to look ridiculous."
The room was very quiet.
Bunce narrowed his eyes at the students around him, many of whom had their eyes tightly shut, and Ron muttered to himself,"Take off its legs." Bunce knew what Ron was talking about: Ron was most afraid of spiders.
"Is everyone ready?" asked Professor Lupin.
"Neville, we're going back," said Professor Lupin."Give you some space, will you? I'll call the next person forward. Now, everybody back, give Neville some space-"
They all backed away, back against the wall, leaving Neville alone by the wardrobe. Neville looked pale and frightened, but he had rolled up the sleeves of his robes and gripped his wand tightly.
"On the count of three, Neville," said Professor Lupin, pointing his own wand at the wardrobe as well.”
The end of the Professor's wand sent a burst of sparks that hit the handle of the wardrobe door. The closet door burst open. The hook-nosed, threatening-looking Professor Snape came out, his eyes blazing at Neville.
Neville backed away, his wand raised, his mouth agape. Snape was closing in on him, his hand inside his robes.
"S-funny, funny!" Neville shrieked.
There was a noise, like the sound of a whip. Snape stumbled; he was wearing a long, lacy dress, a tall hat topped with a moth-eaten stuffed eagle, and an enormous scarlet handbag dangling in his hand.
The class roared with laughter; Professor Lupin shouted,"Parvati, step forward!”
Parvati moved forward, her face stony. Snape walked around her. There was another crack, and Snape was now standing on a bandaged, bloodstained mummy; Its blind eyes turned to Parvati and it began to move toward her, very, very slowly, dragging its feet and raising its stiff arms-
"Funny, funny!" cried Parvati.
The bandages on the mummy's feet were undone. Stumbling from the loose bandages, it fell face forward and its head rolled off.
"Seamus!" cried Professor Lupin.
Seamus hurried past Parvati.
Pa! The place where the mummy had been was now occupied by a woman. Her black hair dragged all the way to the ground, and her face was only a skeleton, and it was green and gloomy. She was a female ghost. She opened her mouth wide, and an inhuman voice filled the room, a long, mournful scream that made one's hair stand on end-
"Funny, funny!" shouted Seamus.
The female ghost let out a tearing sound and grabbed her throat. Her voice was gone.
Pa! The female ghost turned into a rat and circled around in search of her tail. Turn into a rattlesnake, slithering and twisting-and then-pop! It became a bloodstained eyeball again.
"It's already lost its mind!" cried Professor Lupin."We've made another step forward! Bunce!"
Bangs had barely reached the boggart when the latter began to muddle through things-a biting teapot, a broken head, a piece of rotting intestines, a broken hand, a pot of sunflowers
"How is this possible?" said Professor Lupin doubtfully.
As he approached the boggart, he saw a silver sphere hanging in the air, and Lupin said almost lazily,"Funny, funny!"
Pa!
"Come on up front, Neville, and finish it off!”said Lupin, as the boggart landed on the floor and transformed into a cockroach. Pa! Snape was back. This time Neville charged forward, looking determined.
"Funny, funny!" he shouted, and within a second Snape appeared in front of Neville in his lacy dress, who gave a loud laugh."Hah!" And so the boggart exploded into a thousand wisps of smoke and vanished.
"Wonderful!" cried Professor Lupin as the class applauded. "Excellent, Neville. Well done, everyone. Let's see, five points for Gryffindor, because everyone dealt with the boggart-ten points for Neville, because he did it twice-five points each for Harry and Hermione.”
"But I didn't do anything.”said Harry.
"You and Hermione both answered my questions correctly at the beginning of the lesson, Harry.”Lupin said easily,"Very well, everyone, very good lesson. Homework, please read the chapter on boggarts and write a summary for Monday. No more.”
The entire class left the staff lounge, talking excitedly.
"Did you see me deal with the female ghost?”Seamus shouted.
"See Snape in the hat?”
"And my mummy!"
"I don't know why Professor Lupin is afraid of crystal balls.”Lavender mused.
"This was the best Defense Against the Dark Arts lesson we've ever had, wasn't it?”said Ron excitedly as they walked back to the classroom to get their bags.
"Why is Bunce's boggart so strange?”asked Harry.
"Come on, it's easy, because he's a strange person.”said Ron.
"I can hear you, Ron.”Bangs said with a smile.
"He seems to be a very good teacher," said Hermione approvingly."But I'd like to fight the boggart-"
"What are you afraid of?" Ron snickered."Too easy homework?”
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