Time: 2009-4-25:15:22 Words: 3483
In the days in the brick kiln, he was muddled every day. There was no need for dates and times here. He rose at sunrise and returned at sunset. He hurriedly washed his face in the public basin in the kitchen. The water in the basin was so dirty that he could not see the bottom, but it was much better than the water in the sink. The water in the basin smelled of sweat, and the water in the sink smelled disgusting. Zhiyuan was about to set off. He walked along the dried river in front of the house and onto the country road outside the brick kiln. He did not walk out of the brick kiln directly. He wanted to walk to his second uncle's house. Everyone was working in full swing. He felt empty in his heart when he went out. Although no one would be jealous, he was not relaxed either. He felt as depressed as if he had been separated from the group.
It was still the same road that they had come from. The earth had long since been awakened by the spring breeze. The wheat seedlings in the ground had already begun to turn green, and the grass had also quietly poked its head out from the ground. The little green had exchanged for the vitality of the earth. Zhiyuan could still vaguely remember some special signs. The stone house in the village and the stone tablet at the entrance of the village were still standing in place. After passing the village, there was still a distance of three kilometers from the Kuangqu. Zhiyuan walked alone on the roadside where cars came and went. The warm spring breeze blew gently on his face. He walked in the wind with a letter to Yan Mei in his arms. The dust raised by the car hit his face and landed on his body. He covered his face and lowered his head as he hurried all the way. He wanted to send the letter to Yan Mei as soon as possible. The letter contained his apology for being late and his confession. He was catching up with the time he missed. Chasing after the days when she escaped from the beauty.
They finally arrived at the Kuangqu. Zhiyuan didn't know how long it took to get there, but the mining area was still bustling. Families of miners who went out to buy vegetables in groups of two or three stopped by the roadside stalls from time to time. Most families had men working while women stayed at home to do laundry, cook, take care of the house, and look after the children. Working in the coal mine was dangerous, and the safety of the country's large coal mines was guaranteed compared to small coal mines. The family members had been on tenterhooks during the man's working hours. They were deeply afraid that there would be disturbing news. After a long time, they slowly got used to it. Zhiyuan had heard all this from his second aunt, who had been worried about him before. The retired workers enjoyed the welfare treatment given by the country after decades of hard work. People looked relaxed and at ease. The pace of life was as relaxed as their mood. This was the survival situation of coal miners determined by their stable jobs and income.
Of course, Zhiyuan was not as relaxed as they were. He had been busy all the time, but he had not been able to survive. His efforts had always been greater than his gains. His hard work could not water the seeds of hope. Perhaps his eagerness for success had made him lose patience for anything. He did not wait patiently for the emergence of hope and gave up his last persistence. Just like on his way to school, he naively believed that he could not find money in books, that he could not draw the beauty and brightness of tomorrow's life in pen words, and that the dullness of mathematics, physics, and chemistry made him lose interest in learning. He fantasized that the other world he went out to make a living would be the same as those in Hong Kong and Taiwan movies. In the world of debauchery, he would be holding a mobile phone and being surrounded by people. Now, he knew the root of his fatal mistake. He was childish and ambitious, including his rebuttal to Yan Mei's painstaking persuasion. Now that Zhiyuan had broken away from the guidance of knowledge, he could only start from scratch. He had no right to choose in fate, only the chance to fight with all his might. The chances of victory and defeat were equal. He had bet on the bright side. He was prepared to pay everything and must be able to bear everything. In front of the gambling table of fate, since he had already made the wrong bet, he would not choose to give up the limited opportunity to change the situation. Giving up also meant admitting defeat. He had already lost the prime of his life. He could only continue to use his youth as a bet. He had already wasted many good times. The hands of youth were tightly held. He did not dare to relax and was unwilling to give up, but everything was beyond his control. The arrangement of fate could not be changed so easily. He did not become an exception to luck, nor did he escape the hand of misfortune. The spark of life lit up the dark corner in the difficult friction, allowing the footsteps walking in the darkness to find a home to stay.
Walking through the crowd, Zhiyuan's lonely heart was lost in the laughter of others. He seemed to be watched by everyone. He hadn't combed his hair for a few days, and his messy hair was either messy or standing up. He was wearing a green military uniform that didn't fit him. It was the attire he wore when he worshipped soldiers. His clothes were not only loose but also stained with yellow mud. The bottom of his pants was torn. The cloth shoes on his feet were worn by his father. His big toe had already pierced through the socks and the constraints of the black velvet cloth shoes. It had penetrated his mother's caring care. He was reluctant to throw it away and still wore it on his feet. His mother had originally made a new pair of cloth shoes for him. He was reluctant to take it. It was his mother who stayed up late and put it together. He was reluctant to wear the new shoes that contained his mother's blood and sweat, so he left them to his father.
Zhiyuan, who was deep in thought, was not drugged by vanity. A poor and destitute soul would not have the idea of being in prosperity at this moment. It was normal to face the reality positively. When he saw the post office, his focused gaze finally found the golden signboard with a dark green lining. The post office was located on the ground floor of a miner's dormitory building. It was specially opened for the employees of the coal mine. Of course, it was also open to the public. The size of the coal mine could be seen from the layout of the post office and the dormitory buildings. He quickly stepped onto the steps of the post office. The glass door was not locked, so someone must be working. He pushed open the ajar door. The post office was unusually deserted. A female salesperson with glasses was busy sorting out the information in her hand at the counter across the iron fence. When she heard the door, she habitually looked up and greeted,"W-what are you doing?" Zhiyuan quickly reacted to the salesperson's surprised expression. He must have been frightened by his appearance. Zhiyuan felt that there was even a trace of panic in the salesperson's tone. Obviously, the salesperson's habitual greeting had changed slightly after Zhiyuan appeared. " I want to mail the letter." Zhiyuan tried his best to remain calm with a red face. He did not expect to spend so much effort to mail the letter, and he also had the unexpected pressure of being misunderstood. He did not know where the salesperson's surprise came from. Who did she mistake him for? A bad person or a beggar? Hearing the uninvited guest in front of her say " mail ", the salesperson understood Zhiyuan's intention." Do you want to send a registered letter or an ordinary letter? Do you need stamps?" The stamps were 20 cents and the envelopes were 10 cents each.”Zhiyuan quickly said,"I'll mail it by ordinary mail. I'll take a stamp and an envelope."”Zhiyuan could see that the salesperson's expression showed that she had almost misunderstood someone else. Perhaps it was not because she was judging people by their appearance, but because they were also in the business of money transfer. Zhiyuan unbuttoned the left front pocket of his shirt and took out a wad of crumpled money. He had less than 10 yuan left from Yang Wu's medical fees, and with his own pocket money, he only had about 30 yuan left. He had only spent about three yuan out of the 20 yuan in a month. Even with this injury, he had only bought a few packets of instant noodles to increase his nutrition. He took out 30 cents and handed it to the counter. He carefully took out the letter to Yanmei from his right pocket. He placed the folded letter flat on the counter and gently smoothed out the wrinkles at the corner with his right hand. He gently put the letter soaked in his blood into the envelope and sealed it before handing it to the salesperson. He saw that the salesperson stamped the record and put it aside. There was already a stack of letters waiting to be mailed. After seeing the letter in the salesperson's hands, Zhiyuan's heart, which had been floating for a long time, finally settled down.
He didn't feel too relaxed after removing the burden in his heart. The guilt that he had been waiting for for Yan Mei for a long time was temporarily comforted. The pressure of life still felt like a burden on him. He avoided people's gazes. He felt that he was eye-catching in the crowd. He was afraid of people's disdainful gazes. He escaped from the crowd and took a few turns before finally arriving at the building where his second uncle lived. The dormitory where Second Uncle lived was very old. There were many garbage piles downstairs. Since there was no management or sewage facilities upstairs, everyone would throw the garbage downstairs when no one was paying attention. The sewage poured downstairs mixed with the accumulated garbage and emitted a disgusting smell. The corridor upstairs was filled with junk, and some residents had used rubber bags to occupy the open space to store junk. It was almost lunchtime. The chimneys on the upper floor stuck out their long black tongues. The thick smoke was blown away by the wind. The smoke covered the entire dormitory building and drifted into the distance. The chimneys and smoke interweaved to form a unique scenery of the Kuangqu. The water pipe in front of the building was crowded with the families of the miners waiting to cook. From the anxious face of the woman, it could be seen that the men in the family were waiting to go to work after dinner, while the women who were not in a hurry looked at the water pipe from time to time. They would only come slowly when there was no one crowded.
Standing at the door of his second uncle's house for a long time, Zhiyuan did not dare to knock. He could hear the voices of everyone in the house. He did not know if his appearance would embarrass his second uncle's family in front of the neighbors. He tried to cover the scar on his head with his hair. While he was hesitating at the door of his second uncle's house, he also aroused the suspicion of the neighbors. Some people also looked at him curiously. He heard everyone's whispers."Who is that young man? I've been wandering around there for a while. Who is this person? Why haven't I seen him before? Why does he look like that? He doesn't look like a good person.”"Don't say that," said an old man."Maybe he's a relative from Matthew's hometown. Let's go over and ask."”As the old man spoke, he walked towards Zhiyuan. Under everyone's gaze, the old man walked up to him and asked kindly,""Where are you from? Is Matthew your relative?”Zhiyuan did not expect his hesitation to cause such a big misunderstanding. He quickly said,"I'm here to look for my second uncle. The Old Miao you're talking about is my second uncle.”After Zhiyuan finished explaining, he quickly emphasized," It's my biological second uncle." Hearing Zhiyuan's words, the neighbors who had just surrounded them dispersed. "Then why didn't you go in? When it's time to eat, why are you still hesitating at your own door? Matthew, open the door. Your nephew is here.”After the old man understood the truth, he shouted at his second uncle's house before Zhiyuan could say anything. The door opened. It was Second Uncle. He was surprised to see Zhiyuan with a dirty head and unkempt face. He knew that Zhiyuan had a hard time in the brick kiln, but Zhiyuan's down-and-out appearance was clearly beyond his expectations.
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