(Vol 4.7: Nightmare, a childhood nightmare)
[Ji Residence--Southern Kingdom's Moyun City]
Hehe, he sneered in his heart. Zuo Xi, you are becoming less and less like yourself. In the past, besides Ah Xin, who else could touch your heart? Where are your emotions?
The first lesson in Cold Moon Palace was how to sneak. Merging with the darkness was the best stealth. And this is the lesson I learned the best, to become one with the darkness? I've always lived in darkness.
It was as if I could see how I, who was only three years old, dragged my crippled body back to the Xian Yue Palace. I seemed to have seen it again. When I accidentally heard that my mother was in the Clear Cloud Hall, what kind of mood did I have when I met that demon-like woman? Escape? I yearned for the warmth in my mother's arms, but she treated me like a doll and kicked me back and forth. Was she angry? Will you hold me in your hands?
However, the injuries all over my body left me no room to think. I had no choice but to leave step by step. After so many years, I seem to have forgotten this fact.
Darkness, I belong to darkness.
In the pitch-black inner room, I could only smell a complex medicinal fragrance. Other than several high-quality poisons, the rest were neutral drugs that were easy to be good or bad.
This Aunt Yun was really not an ordinary person. I could only vaguely recognize the few unfamiliar medicines here. He had only seen it in medical skills. However, she has just started making the Tricolor Crystal, and I don't remember the complete formula for the Tricolor Crystal. Where should he start?
I casually flipped through the neat medicine basket, but heard the sound of a fire. It sounded in the inner room. I lazily looked back and saw the pale face of Yuetong in the faint firelight.
"You... Xiao Yi, didn't I say I didn't want you to get involved in this?”He turned his head helplessly and his voice was low and deep. I moved my lips but didn't say anything.
"You really came in the middle of the night. Oh, Xiao Yi, really don't care, okay?”He lowered his head, his fingers gently moving on the wooden board as he spoke. I felt a chill in my heart and asked,"Even if I know that this matter is a great harm to you and Aunt Yun, don't care, right?"”"You actually care about me." he said bleakly, clenching his fists."But I don't want you to get involved."
I was stunned. What were they planning? However, he did remind me. I shouldn't have cared, should I? "Then, you're on your own. However, I have always protected this land and will never let anyone waver in the slightest." After that, I looked at his side profile deeply, sighed and flew away.
In the silent night, only the sound of intense breathing and helpless sighs could be heard.
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[New Year's Eve]
The sky had just brightened. Last night's incident disturbed my mind, so I got up early, took the moon flute, and ran out of the Ji residence. He walked alone to the Lingyun Mountain where the Heavenly Spirit Temple was located that day.
This mountain was actually quite high. It took me two hours to reach the mountainside. When I passed by the Heavenly Spirit Temple earlier, a stone was stuck in my heart. Should I participate in the matter between Aunt Yun and Yue Tong?
After all, I owed Yue Tong a lot. Even though I knew that it would never be possible between us, he still chose to help me a lot.
I can't watch him die before he gets his revenge. The pain of not having parents could only be experienced personally.
Aunt Yun can't make the Tricolor Crystal anymore, but they must be avenged. Should I really help them? Staring blankly at the thousands of sceneries at the foot of the mountain, he had already climbed to the top of the mountain.
There was silence.
I took out the moon flute, put it to my lips, and played it as if I was crying.
Ah Xin, if you come back. Will you be angry if you find out that I'm soft-hearted towards the two of them? Xin, I'm so tired. This is the first time I feel so tired in seventeen years. I shouldn't have any extra emotions, right?
Before, I was just empty, but never so tired. After meeting Xin, I just desperately rushed, but never tired. Father once said that when you struggle and sink into something, you will feel extremely tired.
I'm not decisive enough, not firm enough, am I?
Zuo Xi, apart from Xin, do you dare to expect others to love you wholeheartedly? Do you know what love is? You only know how to live in the void, you only know how to love without reservation.
Your life is so useless.
I put down my flute, my heart clear.
In this world, even if there are so many feelings, I only need to have my Ah Xin. What else does it have to do with me? You are Zuo Xi, Zuo Xi that only belongs to Ah Xin.
Dear Xin, Xiao Xi won't struggle anymore.
----Zi Shi
After returning to the Ji residence for New Year's Eve dinner, everyone gathered together to chat. It was already midnight, so Aunt Yun called everyone to watch the fireworks while she cooked dumplings at home alone.
Yue Tong looked at her with amusement and advised,"Mother, what's the point of staying at home alone?" I can go out with Xiao Xi." He winked at me, and I stared at Aunt Yun and nodded.
She had no choice but to follow us out of the Ji residence.
Even in the deserted alley outside the Ji residence, one could hear the sound of cannons and see the sky full of fireworks. I pushed Yuetong aside and stood in the middle of the crowd. I turned my head and said indifferently,"I will leave tomorrow." The fireworks above my head spread out like flowers one by one, spitting out the fragrance of viburnu flowers.
He stared at me in surprise and asked in a desolate tone,"Why are you in such a hurry? Is it because you're getting married?" I nodded and stopped talking, but I saw the clear darkness in his eyes and said faintly,"Yue Tong." En, the wedding in March, I have to go back in February. It will take half a month to reach the capital from here."
I hesitated for a moment when I spoke because he grabbed my arm. I didn't care about his rudeness and continued,"Yuetong, uh, don't pester me anymore. I hope that when we meet again, I won't be so helpless." As long as you and Aunt Yun don't hurt the people around me, I won't stop you." He still didn't speak, so I looked up at the sky, my heart cold.
"Xiao Yi. When we meet again, we will be enemies." He faintly spat out these words, his tone was so faint that it surprised me. When I looked at him again, a tear had already fallen into my sleeve from his cold eyes, and it was so hot that it made me panic.
When we meet again, perhaps we will be enemies.
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