Hello! Hello, everyone. Welcome to the elevator late at night to watch today's legal news segment. Today's main content was: A man doesn't come home late at night because his girlfriend is too tight; The husband and wife quarreled frequently, so it was because the wife had too much water in her pants…How about we predict the details? We'll talk about it in the future!
Today, there will be a new and important person on stage. Those who are familiar with me should be familiar with this great god. To make it easier for me to remember, I'll call her Baby.
Speaking of which, this student Bao Bao was truly a world-shaking player who could overturn everyone's outlook on life, love, and sex. Speaking of her, she could definitely make men slippery and women have an extra-womb pregnancy. The child matured early and the fetus was difficult to deliver. In short, she was a weirdo among weirdos. If Jingjing's weirdness score was 7 points, then the baby should be over 10,000!
Speaking of this baby, she had to change the topic. What do you think attracts men the most as a woman?
After thinking about it, there are only four points: A. Chest, B. C. Inner, D. Character. I don't know what you guys choose, but I choose…I choose B.
It was a coincidence that she met the baby. It was really a coincidence. The probability of it being a coincidence was even lower than when you were walking on the street and your body suddenly caught on fire. You were about to be burned to death, but a group of people suddenly came around and spat at you. In the end, you found that your black clothes had been burned to white.
It was his last summer vacation in university. He had just returned home, and there were no girls. The weather was too hot to search the streets. I could only stay at home and feel bored. The material conditions at that time were not as developed as they are now. There was only one computer, and the internet was not connected. One cell phone, no internet access.
As such, I could only scan the mine in front of the computer all day long. As I scanned, whenever I saw the numbers, I couldn't help but shout,""1 grenade on the left! There were three grenades on the right, a total of nine grenades!”The highest realm.
Some people used to say that Minesweeper was like a drug addict, and I finally believed it.
In order to get rid of my addiction to lightning, I made a plan for myself, which was to wake up early every day to run. After running, he would go home and take a shower before continuing to mine.
On the first day of the plan, I got up at six o'clock and put on my Adi King equipment. I opened the door and was about to start when I suddenly realized that it was raining outside. Damn it, isn't this clearly going against me?
Haha! You must have thought that the plan was ruined, right?
Hehe! Yes, I took the umbrella and went out! Running in the rain with an umbrella, no matter how he moved, he wouldn't miss anything. After running back and forth westward for a few kilometers on a rainy day, the sky finally cleared up when the chakras were almost exhausted.
Alright! On the way back, I strangely found a small dining cart selling breakfast at my door. I could smell the fragrance of meat from afar. I'll make it clear in advance that I rarely eat breakfast because I think it's too girly. How can a domineering and pure man like me eat breakfast? Wouldn't it make people laugh until they had benign benign tumors?
But surprisingly, I smelled a magical chicken fragrance, so I walked up and saw a bun seller. I asked,"What bag?"
The other party was a little girl.”F * ck, chicken bun? This was the first time in his life that he had heard of such a strange bun as the chicken bun. The chicken tasted crispy! So I boldly took out a dollar."Give me two!"
In the end, I happily took the two buns home.
Yes! The content above has nothing to do with this article. It's purely a test of typing speed... If you're cheated, don't curse! Alright then! He continued.
After returning home and eating the steamed buns, he switched on his phone and started minesweeper. As she swept the room, she felt extremely sleepy and fell asleep. In a daze, I was shaken awake. When I woke up, it was my sister who had returned to her parents 'house. I saw her sitting by my bed and talking. I don't remember what he said. I only remember that my stomach suddenly hurt. I thought to myself,'What a good Red Brand Chicken Bun. It's really not simple.'
I turned around to go to the bathroom, but just as I opened the door, I stopped. I had a habit, or rather, every man had this habit, and that was to read something when going to the bathroom. At that time, there was no smartphone. When he went to the toilet, he could only read books and newspapers to show that he was unfathomable. He didn't have a book or a newspaper, but he read the instructions for the toothpaste and shower gel thoroughly.
Unfortunately, I had memorized the instructions for the toiletries in the toilet back then. He kept saying,"If you accidentally get into your eyes, please rinse them with plenty of water or go to the hospital in time." The good thing is that every time I wash my hair, the foam will almost always enter my eyes. I'll wipe it with a towel and it'll be done immediately. I said I'd go to the hospital for treatment, but didn't I have to pour the entire bottle of shampoo into my eyes?
At this critical moment, I found the phone that my sister had left beside my bed. Her phone could be unlocked. In that era, how high-end was that?
I took my phone and went into the bathroom. After opening QQ, I saw a few friends. I found a know-it-all and asked eagerly, Are there any girls! Hurry up and get one! I'm so bored that grass is growing on my balls ~
That know-it-all was actually the type who couldn't get a fart out of eight sticks. He usually liked to brag. At the critical moment, he couldn't even call out half a girl.
However, unexpectedly, he replied very quickly that day," Yes!”Then, he gave me a QQ number and asked me to contact him myself. Thus, the eternal love between me and my baby began.
You see, if I didn't minesweeper, I wouldn't want to run. If I didn't run, I wouldn't eat chicken buns. If I didn't eat chicken buns, I wouldn't go to the toilet. If my sister didn't come, I wouldn't go to QQ. Then she wouldn't be able to get to know the baby. All in all, everything shows that the relationship between me and the baby is a mess.
It was destined that he could not hide.
It's time to complain, everyone, come and listen to me complain!
People around me often say that I'm a person who likes to touch and talk nonsense. This kind of honor doesn't seem very appropriate, of course! Personally, I strongly disagree with such praise. However, as time passed, once I accepted this setting, I would not talk nonsense for no reason. If I did not touch my chest at night, it would be as if I was letting someone down.
For a 18K man like me, it's common for me to be too lazy to wash up before going to bed when I have a lot of nightlife. This directly leads to a serious problem. When I wake up in the morning and accidentally glance at the girl beside me, her originally white breasts will become abnormally black! If one were to get close and take a whiff, they would be able to smell all kinds of flavors, such as curry chicken, sour and spicy shredded potatoes, and…abalone! Uh…I mean, real abalone.
ok。After complaining, they continued to talk about the baby. Speaking of which, I said that I got the baby's number, but unfortunately, I only got a Q number, not a mobile number. So in the following days, I began to calculate when I would go to the internet cafe and add this girl.
But this thing called QQ?
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