The northernmost part of Qingcheng has always been a forbidden area. Even Gong Huai Ming and the others can't enter as they please. I grew up here.
In the winter when I was four years old, my mother took me away from the mansion that could not be called home. My father did not ask me to stay, but silently followed behind for a long time. At that time, I did not understand what happened. I only remembered that when we parted, it was my father who cried, but my mother kept smiling, even though she held my hand very tightly, so tightly that it hurt a little.
Her mother had never been allowed to stay in that mansion from the very beginning. Her father had protected her for six years, but he still could not make her stay in that family.
When I first saw Lanshan, I looked up at her and then at Mother. I was confused for a while. I didn't understand why she looked exactly the same as Mother. They had the same face, but they had completely different gazes. One was sharp and deep, and the other was like water.
Mother and Lanshan were twin sisters. Mother was the older sister. They were born together, grew up together, and practiced martial arts together. They were supposed to become the totems of the city, but because Mother met Father, their original life trajectory was divided into two different directions in the three years of Jiande. One wielded a sword and dominated the Jianghu, while the other fell into a wealthy family.
Mother said that Father and Mother separated because they loved each other. At my age, I naturally didn't understand. Lanshan understood, but she couldn't accept it. To Lanshan, her sister, who accompanied her every day, suddenly said something strange to her one day and then disappeared. When she reappeared six years later, she was no longer as elegant as before. She brought a four-year-old girl and dragged a tottering body in front of her. If Mother hadn't stopped her, Lanshan would have killed Father.
After a long time, I finally understood that the most difficult time had passed. As I was born and gradually grew up, it wasn't that my parents couldn't be together. On the surface, they had the same excuse for being so cruel to separate, but in reality, they had their own choices.
Father loved Mother so much that when Mother asked to leave, he only stayed silent for a moment before nodding and letting her go. Even though I couldn't understand, I didn't doubt his feelings for Mother. Every time it was Mother's death anniversary, I would see a man who had been tortured by heartbreak and guilt for many years appear in front of Mother's soul. As the years passed, that taciturn man became more and more taciturn.
Compared to her father, her mother's love was more sorrowful and more difficult to understand. She left because she did not want to die in front of her father.
I didn't know when Mother's health started to deteriorate. The first time I saw her vomiting blood in the middle of the night, I was so scared that I couldn't even cry. However, the next day, she didn't seem to be any different. I couldn't help but suspect that I was just having a nightmare.
Of course, this wasn't a dream. Mother brought me back to Qingcheng not only because she didn't want me to grow up alone in that mansion and wanted to entrust me to Lanshan, but also because she wanted to find Tang Jie to help her extend her life. Mother said that I was still too young and she couldn't die too early.
Very few people knew that aside from martial arts, the Castellan of Qingcheng City, Tang Jie, was most skilled in medicine. Among Tang Jie's direct disciples, Shen Lin was the only one who had been taught in this field.
With Tang Jie around, Mother really saw improvement day by day. I was happy in my heart and thought that the days of fear had passed, but I didn't think that when fate came, it couldn't be stopped.
In the summer of the 10th year of Jiande, Tang Jie and Lan Shan suddenly received a piece of news and left in a hurry without saying a word. For many days, no one knew where they went or what they were doing.
Later on, I found out that they went into the palace. Tang Jie did his best to win five days for Emperor Jian De, who was suddenly poisoned. In these five days, many things happened, which gave Emperor Jian De time to change some things.
Five days later, Emperor Jian De passed away, and the Empress who did not have enough wealth to protect the Crown Prince died with him. Prince Rui obtained military power and stationed troops outside the city to swear allegiance to the Crown Prince. Concubine Xue obtained the Crown Prince and had the opportunity to become the Empress Dowager.
These things were very far away from me back then. I only knew that Mother's health suddenly deteriorated on the second day after Lanshan and the others left. For a few days, she was less and less awake. When she was asleep, the blood on her lips was almost non-stop. It was so much that I couldn't wipe it off no matter how hard I tried. Because Tang Jie and Lanshan weren't around, I couldn't find anyone to save Mother, and I didn't dare to leave her side.
On the day when the funeral bell rang and the streets were filled with white silk, no one would have thought that in a room at the northernmost end of Qingcheng, a woman who could have been famous all over the world would die alone at the age of twenty-three. There was only me by her side.
This year, I was five years old.
I didn't see Mother when she left. She talked for a while and pulled me to look at her for a long time. In the end, she said that she didn't want to be dirty and asked me to wring a wet handkerchief to wipe her face. However, when I came back, I couldn't wake her up. She had been tortured for so long and could finally sleep peacefully.
At the age of five, I already understood the meaning of death. Mother had this awareness very early on. She told me that everyone would eventually reach this stage. I could be sad, but I shouldn't let it occupy me for too long.
Looking at her sleeping face, I knew that she had completely left me and would not come back. There would never be such a person in the future.
I carefully helped her wipe her face clean. I didn't have the strength to move her body to change her clothes, so I could only hold her hand and sit on the ground by the bed. When I was too sad, I would cry softly for a while. After crying, I would listen to my mother and wait for Lanshan to come back.
When Lanshan finally came back, I had already held onto Mother's cold hand and spent the entire night alone. When I heard Lanshan rush in, I slowly raised my head to look at her. I didn't cry, I just looked at her with a little desire and confusion.
Lanshan said that she would never forget that look in my eyes.
Tang Jie came in from behind. Lan Shan looked at her mother and was stunned for a moment. Suddenly, she rushed towards Tang Jie, pushing and hitting him as she shouted," Why is this happening? Why can we save the world but not her?"
I got up from the ground and stood at the side. I looked straight at Tang Jie who was hugging Lanshan without saying a word. I looked at Lanshan who was crying heartbreakingly for a long time beside my mother. It wasn't until Lanshan squatted in front of me and apologized to me with tears streaming down her face, which was exactly the same as Mother's, that I gently shed tears and gently threw myself into Lanshan's arms.
Even though I was hugged tightly by Lanshan, I still didn't dare to cry loudly. Even though I was very uncomfortable, I was afraid that once I cried without restraint, I would forget the words that my mother told me to remember before she died. Mother was so weak, and she only said it once. I didn't want to forget a single word.
For a day and a night, I forced myself to repeat it over and over again in my mind.
Mother chose her own path. She had no regrets or hatred.
Don't tell anyone who your father is, including Lanshan.
When you grow up, you will return to your father's side.
Yanyan, if you like her, don't give up.# Daguan Review Passed: Daguan Time:111420184: 12PM #Cancel Review All: wdd201302 Time:111420185: 54PM #
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