Xu Ziang listened to Chu Yin's story. Every word he said was like a knife digging out those unbearable days from the bottom of his heart for him to see. It was bloody. Many times, Xu Ziang had wanted to stop him and tell him that nothing was important anymore. Everything was fine as long as he was fine. However, Chu Yin turned a deaf ear to it, as if the more pain he felt, the more pleasure he felt. He could not stop his addiction to self-abuse. Or perhaps, he wanted to wake up all his painful experiences at once to remind himself of what kind of choice he should make right now.
Chu Yin clutched his heart that was tearing at him with some difficulty and continued to speak with difficulty. Xu Ziang could not help but hug him, using his own body to give his cold body a little warmth. Chu Yin's eyes were a little moist, and his voice was choked with sobs."Where were we? Oh, right, Lin Song. Lin Song was the only outsider I met in those years other than the nanny and Lin Xiaoyu. He wasn't considered an outsider. He was the biggest illegitimate child of the Lin family. He was originally wandering outside and was brought back by Lin Xiaoyu's little uncle. The relationship between the two of them was not ordinary. He wondered if everyone in the Lin family was like this. I've seen him on the phone before. There was a deep helplessness hidden in his words, some pleading and some self-pity. I know a little about his situation. It's probably because he's willing to be raped and despised. It's not better for one person to beg but not get anything than for two people to hurt each other. When we were still happy, he must have felt a little indignant. Otherwise, why would he spare no effort to do everything to break us apart? Look, Lin Xiaoyu got married without telling me, Lin Xiaoyu bought my parents 'company without telling me, and he told me the news of my parents passing away in a car accident without telling me. It was as if he had inadvertently pushed all the bad news onto me. You don't understand how I felt at that time. I didn't hate anyone, and I didn't feel like I had to fight to the death with anyone. If there was a grudge, it could only be said that the blueprint that I had lost in the beginning was the culprit of all the bad karma. After going around in circles, it was still my fault. Who asked me to be careless? Who asked me to think that he was the Bole who had saved me from failure? Who asked me to fall into his seductive phoenix eyes bit by bit? Who asked me to be too greedy for the little happiness we had together? Who asked me to lose the principles that I should have for him? Who asked me to not take the money and the apartment back then and insist on going through thick and thin with him? Who asked me to be so reluctant to let go when I should? Who asked me to be so soft-hearted?”Chu Yin finally couldn't hold back his tears anymore, and his voice was choked with sobs.""Dudu... Resentment…I…"
Xu Ziang's heart ached, but there was nothing he could do about it. There was a saying that the one who tied the knot must be the one who untied the knot. Ayin still loved him, but he did not dare to bear the consequences of being together anymore. This time, he was ruthless. He must have been in so much pain that he could not bear to let go. That was why he drove his car and wandered somewhere. He abused the car and himself as if he was venting his anger. He had been shaken by this, so he tore open his already knotted scars piece by piece. Once again, it was exposed to the air. No matter if anyone was listening, it gritted its teeth and continued to speak. That was why it cried so painfully when it really decided to leave.
Xu Ziang's eyes were also a little moist. He didn't know how he felt. His heart was empty, and his mind was devoid of any thoughts. He didn't know what to say to Ain. He wanted to say that he didn't want to get married and didn't care about Lin Xiaoyu anymore. He wanted to say that he would do his best to give her the stable life she wanted. He wanted to say that he could just look at her. But in the end, he didn't say anything. This was because she had never been part of Ain's plans for his entire life. Xu Ziang wondered if Ayin had long noticed his feelings, but had been pretending not to know. No matter what, no matter if Ain was happy or not, he would always be a bystander and not qualified to participate.
Xu Ziang, who finally understood everything, felt his heart twitch for a moment. Ain was right. One person's request but not being able to get anything was no better than two people hurting each other. When two people hurt each other, at least they could still see each other's shadow in their eyes. They were still unwilling to disappear into each other's hearts and did stupid things. However, when a person stood in front of him and smiled at him, he could see the other person's shadow through your eyes, hug you and call out other people's names.
Ain said that I don't understand him, but when did he understand me?
Xu Zi 'ang did not say any of this. He just quietly hugged Chu Yin with a cold expression and tightened his grip on his arm bit by bit. He knew that the person in front of him was soaked in an ice cellar, so cold that he was panicking. He didn't know what choice was best for him. Letting go would hurt, but not letting go would be pestering. How could he be clear about other people's feelings? The only thing she could do was to use her own warmth to soothe her sweetheart's emotions so that he would at least not be in so much pain.
One of them was trying to calm her heart while the other was focused on the first one. Therefore, neither of them noticed that when they started talking, a woman was standing quietly at the door eavesdropping. As she listened, she opened her mouth wide and covered it with her hand. As she listened, she cried, and her tears silently wet her clothes. He clenched his right hand that was holding the thermos tightly. He did not even notice that there was an obvious bloody wound on his palm. Her hand remained in the position of knocking on the door for a long time, but it did not fall. She turned around and left with an indescribable loneliness.
" Ding, ding, ding." Chu Yin's cell phone suddenly rang, interrupting the two people in the room who were hugging each other for warmth. Chu Yin let go of Xu Ziang awkwardly and grabbed his cell phone in a panic. Chu Yin opened it and saw that it was an unfamiliar number. He pressed the answer button in confusion, but the other end of the line was filled with criticism.
"Manager Chu, what did you do to make him stay in the rain for an entire night? Even when he was half-awake and half-dizzy, he still called your name and apologized. What about you? Where are you? You left such a patient behind. If I hadn't called him in the morning, what would have happened if he just lay on the ground and died without anyone caring? What if you burn yourself silly?" Chu Yin's hand that was holding the phone paused for a moment. It was Lin Song's voice. He had always been timid, but he had such explosive power. It seemed that he was really very sick. He tried his best to suppress the weakness and pain in his heart, but he could not suppress it no matter what. He had no choice but to change his method of concealment. He tried his best to calm his trembling voice and said indifferently,"Secretary Lin seems to have found the wrong person. Chu Yin isn't that capable and doesn't have the ability. Besides, Chu Yin has long had nothing to do with CEO Lin. It was not that Chu Yin was narcissistic, but if Chu Yin had to take care of every person who liked him when they were sick, wouldn't he be exhausted? Therefore, as a secretary, she just had to do her job properly. Whether CEO Lin was happy or in pain or dead or alive had nothing to do with Chu Yin. It was best that Secretary Lin didn't call again.”Although she said that, her tears could not stop. Her heart was also throbbing in pain. He even had the strength to hang up the phone. Until a weak but dignified voice came from the other side."Song, I'm fine after hanging up. You don't understand. It's not what you think. Don't disturb him.”Chu Yin couldn't help but cry out loud, but he bit his lips tightly in the next second. Lin Song had already heard it, and even the words " Is your heart made of stone " were stuck in his throat. He looked at his boss, who was so weak that he was beyond words, and then thought of Chu Yin, who was pretending to be cold but could not even hold back his cries. In the end, he sighed helplessly. Why bother? She then thought of a ridiculous saying,'Love is poison, poison.' She silently took care of Lin Xiaoyu on behalf of Chu Yin. After all, he was her brother and Prince Charming. Unrequited love was also very bitter. I don't understand, I don't understand. You're talking as if you're not the one who rejected me. When did you ever understand the feeling of having your first love killed in the cradle?
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