Zheng Qinglan hadn't been in a good state recently. She was always absent-minded when she was writing. He felt anxious and helpless. After returning home, he naturally didn't have a good expression towards Shang Liu Xin. Shang Liu Xin would occasionally complain, but most of the time, she would turn a blind eye to it. It was just that one didn't know if she really didn't see it or if she was pretending not to see it.
After work at noon, Zheng Qinglan was pushing her cart on the street when she suddenly heard a thick voice calling her from behind. He turned around and was shocked. It was Jin Ling who called him. "What the hell? You scared me." Seeing Zheng Qinglan's shocked expression, Jin Ling laughed so hard that tears came out of her eyes." I learned it from you."”Zheng Qinglan kept watching her smile. When she was done, she asked,""Are you done laughing? Why are you in the city?”"Why? Can't I come to the city?”"You're arguing again. I'm asking why you're here today.”"Didn't you say that you wanted me to walk outside more? I walked and walked until I reached the city.”"You're not honest at all. Did you walk into the city? Did you suffer that much? I don't believe it." "This is what you call bickering. The walking here means to experience and observe the feelings.”"What did you feel from your experience?”"There are too many of them. They are all written in my works.”"Write it as soon as possible so that I can read it as soon as possible. Seriously, what else do you have to do in the city this time?”"You can say yes or no.”"What you said is confusing. Is there any?”"If there's anything, I'm just here to see my brother, sister-in-law, and you. If I didn't, I just took this opportunity to look around. I didn't have any specific purpose. If I saw it, I saw it. If I didn't see it, I didn't see it.”"Hmm, this mentality is not bad. Don't force or ask for too much. Let nature take its course. For authors, this is indeed the case. Although we emphasize that authors should observe life and be a person with a heart for life, I think this is mainly to ask the writer to be focused, not to emphasize that the author deliberately discovers something from life. It was also a kind of fate to discover something of value in life. As the saying goes, if you plant flowers deliberately, they won't bloom, but if you plant willows unintentionally, they will grow into shade. It also meant that you should let nature take its course and don't pursue and discover anything too much. It was still the same saying, the article was made in nature, and it was accidentally obtained by a clever hand.”"Now that you've said it, I don't feel any pressure anymore. If I see it, I see it. If I feel it, I feel it. I can't 'force myself to worry about writing a new word'.”"Yes, yes, that's what I meant. You're indeed perceptive. You're a talent that can be created, haha.”"You're putting on the airs of a teacher again, and you're even saying that you don't want to be a teacher.”"I'm not lecturing you. I'm clearly communicating with you as an equal.”"Alright, so be it. I'm happy to have you as my teacher, okay?”"I don't want to be your teacher. Your student is not easy to teach.”"Forget it, let's not talk about this. My brother and sister-in-law asked me to treat you to dinner. Let's go!”"No, no, I didn't tell my family. She'll be anxious if I don't go back. Go back and eat. Come to the museum in the afternoon. I'll bring you to meet our director. My office is on the second floor. Go upstairs and turn right. It's the third office.”Jin Ling seemed a little unhappy. She paused for a moment and said,"Since you said that you're afraid that she'll be anxious at home, then forget it if you don't go. I still have to go back in the afternoon. If I come to the museum, I'm afraid I won't be able to catch the bus back.”"It's fine. Don't worry. Director Luo has been wanting to see you for a long time. This is a very good opportunity. We can meet and chat for a while.”"Then it's settled. I'll come over as soon as I eat.”"Alright, it's settled then. See you there.”
Zheng Qinglan put down her chopsticks and said,""I still have something to do in the morning. I have to go and finish it now.”"Go ahead. No one will stop you.”Zheng Qinglan patted Yaya's face and said,""Little sweetheart, listen to Mommy at home. Daddy is going to work.”After leaving the house, Zheng Qinglan thought,'Isn't it inappropriate for me to do this? I should at least tell Shang Liu Xin the truth. What I do is what I do. Why do I have to hide it?' He still couldn't tell her the truth. If he told her the truth, she would definitely become suspicious. Her mouth didn't care about the wind, and she might spread the news. This wouldn't be good for everyone. I wanted to tell her that it was fine to receive an author. This was true. Why didn't I think of it just now? If I encounter such a thing again in the future, I should tell her the truth. Why are you thinking so much? Let's go. Maybe Jin Ling has arrived early. Zheng Qinglan didn't see Jin Ling at the entrance of the cultural center. He parked the car and went upstairs to get a newspaper. He found a place to sit down and read the newspaper while waiting for Jin Ling. He glanced around from time to time to see if Jin Ling had come. Zheng Qinglan usually had the habit of taking a nap, but today she wasn't sleepy at all. Instead, she was very energetic. When he looked around again, he saw Jin Ling walking slowly from afar. He stood up and Jin Ling walked in front of him in a moment. She was carrying two toilet bags in her hands. He guessed that these should be the things Jin Zhu asked Jin Ling to bring to their parents.
"Why did you come so quickly? Did you come without eating?”"What do you think? I'm waiting for you here.”"Ah, you really didn't eat." "I'm not that stupid. I obviously have food to eat and I'm waiting here on an empty stomach. I've eaten. I ate as soon as I went back. I came here as soon as I put down the bowl.”"My brother and sister-in-law scolded you." "What about me?" " She said that you have a family now, and she couldn't let go of you. She even said…" She stopped talking. "Let's go in. What else was there to say? Why didn't he continue?”"Nothing much." "Hehe, I know even if you don't say it.”"You've become a god. What else did they say? There's a prize for guessing correctly.”"I'm not guessing, I'm 100% sure. They're definitely talking about you. They want you to find a friend as soon as possible, right? Come, come in. This is my office. Actually, it's not really an office. The conditions are limited, so this is all I can do. Isn't it a little shabby?”"I think it's quite good. It's clean and simple. It's a place to do things. Back then, didn't Leader Mao command thousands of troops in Yan 'an's cave?”"God, you really know how to compare. How can a small cultural center in a small county like ours dare to compare with a cave in Yan 'an? How can a small staff member of a small cultural center like me compare with a great leader who can command the world?”"You're being literal again. That's what I meant. I believe that such a place can still produce great works.”"Thank you for your flattery. Sigh, I guessed correctly just now, right?”"That's right, it's only one somersault away from Sun Wukong.”"That's impossible. Then what else do you think they said?”"I won't tell you, but even if you guessed wrong, there will still be a reward. Here, I took some things from my brother's shop.”"She's just a two-year-old child. How can she eat so much? Take her back and sell her.”"There's one in the shop. If I say it's for you, it's for you. Why should I bring it back? Here, this is a packet of tea leaves for Director Luo. It's the best tea leaves in my brother's shop.”"You're too polite. Director Luo won't accept it. He never accepts anything from others.”"Then what should I do? How about this? I'll just say that my cousin asked me to bring it, okay?”"That's the only way to put it. Where have you been these days?”"Where can I go? I don't have an official identity like you guys. If I want to go anywhere, I can only go shopping by myself. For example, the streets, the market, the hospital in the town, and places with many people.”"Life. There is life everywhere. As long as there are people, there will be life and a source of creation. It doesn't matter if the author has an identity or not. Just look at Cao Xueqin, who did not have any works when he was living a good life. On the contrary, he only wrote 'Dream of the Red Chamber' after his family declined. Tolstoy was originally born into a noble family, but later he voluntarily gave up his noble identity. The most lively poems in 'The Book of Songs' are those poems that came from the people. There are too many examples of this. Writing was different from studying knowledge. Without an identity, one could experience the truest life, and thus write the most infectious works. Look at Emperor Qianlong, who wrote more than 20,000 poems in his life. He could be considered a prolific poet, but there were almost no truly tasteful ones.”"Hmm, that makes sense. This was an era of change. There were many things that needed to be shown, but they just couldn't figure out the clues and grasp the key points.”"No one can help you with this. Other than geniuses, most authors have a process of accumulation and sublimation. Look at those who won the Nobel Prize in Literature. Is there even a young man? They are all older people. Such people have enough life experience, enough writing experience, and enough writing skills.”"This path is actually very difficult and bumpy. It's really not easy to keep walking.”"Yes, only those who really love it can persevere. Can you persevere?”"I don't know. I'm different from you. Your profession is writing, while mine is farming and running a small shop.”"You can treat this as a hobby and develop it slowly. When you have the capital, you can turn around.”"Let nature take its course. It's already two o'clock. It's your working time, right?”"Yes, Director Luo should be here soon. Are you nervous?" "I'm not nervous, I just feel a little unnatural.”"It's nothing. He's a very good person. Just treat him as your cousin. Listen, he's here.”"You didn't see him, so how do you know he's here?”"Listen to the footsteps. Everyone's footsteps are different. You can guess who it is by listening to the footsteps. Come, give me the tea leaves.”
Zheng Qinglan walked out of the office. As soon as Luo Tianyin went upstairs, Zheng Qinglan said,"Teacher, a young man wants to visit you.”"Who is it? Where is it?" "This is it." As she spoke, she pointed to the house and Jin Ling walked out. "Oh, what a beautiful girl. You must be Jin Ling, right?”"Yes, hello, Director Luo. I'm Jin Ling. How did you guess?”"First of all, you are with Zheng Qinglan. I think it might be you. Also, you look a little similar to Pei Tianwen. After all, you are related by blood. Observing a character is also a basic skill of a writer. In the past, Flaubert had asked Maupassant to observe pedestrians on the street and use the simplest language to express the most representative characteristics of the character. I'm sure you know this story. Come, sit in my office and we'll have a good chat.”The three of them chatted in Luo Tianyin's office for a while. When it was about time, Zheng Qinglan said to Luo Tianyin,""Teacher, Jin Ling still has to go back today. If she goes any later, I'm afraid there won't be a bus.”"Alright, let's end our conversation here today. You're welcome to visit us again when you have time. Your cousin hasn't come to my place for a long time. If you meet him, tell him to come to my place to play. I have two bottles of good wine here. This guy likes to drink the most.”"Okay, I'll thank you on behalf of my cousin. This is a box of tea leaves I brought for you. Please accept it.”Luo Tianyin took it and looked at it.""Top quality Tie Guanyin. This box of tea leaves costs a few hundred yuan. It's too expensive.”"You're talking about the retail price. It's not that expensive for us to purchase.”"Alright, I'll take it." Luo Tianyin muttered to herself. Qinglan, drive Jin Ling home on your bike so you don't miss the bus. Come to my place when you're back."”
There weren't many people on the street, and they all walked leisurely. The leaves of the French parasol tree, which used to be so dense that not a trace of sunlight could penetrate, had turned yellow under the caress of the autumn wind. Some of them could not wait to fall. A gust of wind blew inadvertently, making a rustling sound. "Such a scenery and such a time is really good. I really want to write a poem.”Zheng Qinglan sighed. "Go ahead and write. I'll definitely be your first reader.”"I do have such a strong urge, but I don't know if I can write it. I didn't really write poems in the past, I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to write well.”"If you want to write it, then write it. Writing it for yourself is also very good. However, I also want to read it. I want to see what's the difference between your poems and your novels.”"If it's done, I'll definitely ask for your opinion.”"You're making fun of me again. How would I dare to give you any advice?”"Aren't you moved at all by this scene?”"This…I won't tell you." She shook her head, and a ray of shyness flashed past her eyes. Zheng Qinglan's heart was beating fast. "You should go back. The bus stop is just ahead.”"I said I was going to ride you, but I still walked all the way here. There should still be a car by now. Let's go in and take a look. If there is, you can go back. If there isn't, I'll send you to your brother and sister-in-law.”Zheng Qinglan parked the car and locked it. She walked with Jin Ling to the ticket office and asked if there were any more cars. The ticket seller said that there was one last bus. Zheng Qinglan paid for Jin Ling's ticket, but Jin Ling quickly stopped her and said that she wanted to buy it herself. Zheng Qinglan didn't insist. Jin Ling took the ticket and walked into the iron gate. A few years ago, Zheng Qinglan met Jin Zhu there, and now she was seeing Jin Ling off here. Although the two times were separated by a few years, they were so close to each other, which made people feel an indescribable trance.
Jin Ling turned around and saw that Zheng Qinglan was still standing there. She smiled and waved her hand. Go back. Zheng Qinglan also raised her hand and waved it, but it was stiff. He didn't walk out of the station until Jin Ling disappeared.
Zheng Qinglan hurried back to the museum in a daze. The others had already gotten off work. He spread out a piece of paper and held a pen, trying to turn his feelings into a poem. The golden sunlight, the gentle wind, the rustling leaves, the beautiful golden bell, and the indescribable feelings floated in front of his eyes again and again. His heart rose and fell again and again. He mixed them together, and the tip of his pen immediately gurgled with poetry. In less than a cup of tea, a poem appeared in front of him. He picked it up and read it again and again.
The words on the paper were blurred. Zheng Qinglan looked outside. It was very dark outside. He then remembered that it was time to get off work. When he walked to the street, the street lamps were already lit. The lights shone through the gaps of the leaves. Some were strong, some were weak, and some were mottled. Zheng Qinglan's mood was like the mottled shadow of the lamp. It was hard to tell whether it was bright or dark.
"Did you go out on business again today?" Shang Liu Xin's tone was slightly mocking. "No, I had something on hand and was in a hurry, so I got off work a little late.”"You're getting more and more inaccurate. I thought you weren't coming back for dinner, so I didn't wait for you. The food is still hot. If you think it's cold, I'll heat it up for you.”"No need. The weather isn't cold now.”"Then you can make do with it. I'll tell you something while you eat.”"Yes, what is it?" "Isn't Ya Ya going to kindergarten soon? I went around the street and asked about a few kindergarten.”"Which one do you like?" "Listen to me. There's a kindergarten that's privately run. It accepts quite a number of children. When I was chatting with the boss, she told me that she wanted to hire a kindergarten teacher. She asked me if I was willing to join.”"I'm afraid that won't do." Shang Liu Xin opened her eyes wide and looked at Zheng Qinglan angrily,""Who said I can't? You said I can't, so I can't.”"I didn't say that. The government has a requirement now that kindergarten teachers have to obtain qualifications. You don't have any academic qualifications, and you don't have any qualifications. If the regulations are strict, you won't be able to be a teacher.”"Who cares? Let's do it first. At most, we'll do it later.”"The key is that you don't have anything right now. Your diploma is from high school, and you don't have a teacher's license.”"I'll study my diploma by myself." "Can you do it? You don't usually read books, and you have to sleep whenever you do. How are you going to self-study?”"That's because I haven't been forced to that extent. If I'm forced to, I'll be willing to learn.”"Then there's nothing to force you now.”"Why not? You didn't force me. You're always thinking about that thing of yours and never think about it later. Look at how many people have made a fortune by doing business. Many people have dug walls and holes to build private houses in the city. Look at what we have now. The house belongs to others. A black-and-white television is worth a few hundred yuan. What else do we have? If we move, we just need a burden. This is no different from the old people escaping from famine in the past.”"I'm just working hard. What else can I do? Do you know what kind of people those private houses are? First, they are businessmen. Second, they are the heads of various units. How can we compare with them?”"Why can't we compare? They're humans, and we're humans too. If they can do it, why can't we?”"I mean, they have power and resources in their hands, and I have a pen in my hand.”"Come on, don't talk about this pen of yours. It's only a matter of time before you get rich and live a good life. Since ancient times, there have been few rich people who hold pens. This family definitely can't rely on you alone. I can play, but can I play like this for the rest of my life? I don't want to live such a poor and happy life. No matter where I go, I'll be looked down upon by others.”"What words?" "Laugh at the poor, not at the prostitutes." Zheng Qinglan slammed her chopsticks on the table." Nonsense. You're throwing away your dignity for money. How can you say such things?"”Shang Liu Xin's voice became lower," I didn't say this, many people did.”"When others talk about others, you can't say such things. It's a joke.”"I'm just saying. Why are you so angry?”"Since you're saying this, it means that you agree with this approach. Is this kind of thinking necessary?”"Did I tell you that I agree? Why are you so arbitrary?!" "If you don't agree, why did you say it to him? Is that a good thing? Did it sound good? What would people think if they heard you?”"Don't be so aggressive. If you have the ability to earn a lot of money, I'll be happy to serve you at home.”"Have you never heard of the saying that the poor should be clean and the rich should be clear? Have you only heard those nonsense?”"Alright, alright, alright. I won't argue with you anymore. It's as if I've done something shameful.”
Shang Liu Xin had never seen him lose his temper like this before. She felt a little scared, so she pulled a chair over and sat down. She tried her best to lower her voice and said,"Don't think too much. I don't mean anything else. I just want to go out and do something. I'll earn as much as I can. It's better to pick one than to lose one. Also, if I can go to work in that private kindergarten, Yaya's expenses might be lower, and I can still take care of her. Isn't that a good thing? Let's look around as we walk and see if we can find something better. Ya Ya has gone to kindergarten, and I'm bored at home alone.”"Then go and take a look first. I'll ask around tomorrow. If you want to find a teaching job, a public one definitely won't work. You can only find a private one, and you can only teach young children. Right now, we don't have a private school at all. We only have a private kindergarten, and from the development trend, you have to have a corresponding diploma.”"I'm not afraid. I'll learn. I'm not stupid.”"When is Ya Ya going to kindergarten?”"You're a father. You don't worry about these things at all.”Zheng Qinglan's anger had been completely extinguished by Shang Liu Xin's words. Hearing her words, a sense of guilt surged up again. He asked,""Where's Yaya? Why don't I see her?”"Now you know to ask about her." Zheng Qinglan had always had a feeling that Shang Liu Xin was blaming him whenever she talked to him. He thought that it might be an illusion, but when he thought back to the years he had spent with Shang Liu Xin, this feeling had become clearer and more obvious. Thus, every time he heard such words, he felt disgusted. However, he tried his best to endure it. He didn't want to quarrel with Shang Liu Xin over a small matter. It seemed like he was deliberately picking on her, afraid that Shang Liu Xin would think of something else. Men always had to sacrifice something for women. Therefore, even though his heart was in turmoil, he was still very calm on the surface. Shang Liu Xin didn't seem to notice Zheng Qinglan's tolerance at all. Sometimes, she didn't know when to retreat or when to retreat. She became even more aggressive, making Zheng Qinglan feel that her tolerance and sacrifice were worthless.
The next day, when Zheng Qinglan came back for lunch, Yaya ran over and said,""Daddy, Daddy, I'm going to school tomorrow. Look, this is the flower bag that Mommy bought for me.”"Oh, Ya Ya, be good. You have to listen to your teacher and strive to have a little red flower every day.”"Dad, you're so old-fashioned. Don't people get a little red flower every day and only send it once every few days?”"Hahaha, is that so? Dad is really a little old-fashioned. How about sending it once every few days?”"I don't know either. Anyway, it's not sent once a day.”"Ya Ya, tell Daddy that it's sent once a week.”"Dad, it's sent once a week. You know that, right? If you still don't know, you'll be even more old-fashioned.”"Hahaha, Daddy knows. You can send it once a week. Can you try to bring Daddy back a little red flower every week?”"Okay, my mother is also a teacher there. What do you think?”"Yes, of course. Mommy works there and can take care of Baby Yaya. Daddy can rest assured.”As he spoke, he rubbed his face against Yaya's. Yaya giggled and wriggled in Zheng Qinglan's arms.
"Ya Ya, come down and let daddy wash his hands and eat.”"No, I want to wash my hands with Daddy.”"Okay, okay. Daddy will help you wash your stinky hands.”"No, I'm not a stinky little hand. I'm a fragrant little hand.”"Okay, I'll smell it, I'll smell it. It smells so good. Yaya's hands are so fragrant. Come, Daddy will help you wash them.”Shang Liu Xin had already brought the dishes to the table. A plate of fish, a plate of braised beef, a plate of fried pork, a plate of cucumber, a plate of shredded potatoes, three meat dishes, two vegetables, and a bowl of egg soup. "Why are you spending so much money today? It's as if you're entertaining the chief.”"You can enjoy the treatment of a chief today.”"You really went to work at that private kindergarten?”"Yeah, I've already negotiated with her. She'll officially start work tomorrow. She's taking in 20 to 30 children and needs help. The salary has also been agreed upon. It's exactly 100 yuan per month. How about it? It's about the same as your salary, right? The boss said that if you do well, it can be increased.”"This salary isn't low in our county. The workers in the cotton mill are about the same, and they have to work night shifts. You're lucky." "It's not luck. I feel like the boss is testing me. He let me stay with those children for half a day before giving me a price. Yaya's entrance fee has also been reduced by half, only 100 yuan.”"Ah, her fees are quite high. She charges 200 yuan for half a year.”"Yeah, it's so expensive. The boss only thinks that her house is small. Otherwise, she would have to take in a lot of children. Do you think about how much she can earn a year? Thirty children, six thousand in half a year, twelve thousand a year. She gives me a salary of twelve thousand a year. She can become a ten-thousand-yuan household a year. Isn't she earning money like us at home using a rake to pick up leaves?”"It was quite scary. Our team mobilized people to raise pigs. The team sent people to help build pigsties, and the credit union helped with loans. They said that they wanted to cultivate ten thousand yuan households, but at first, no one dared to do it. Later, the captain persuaded them to work, and finally, one family agreed. The pigsties have been built for a few years, and they are still empty.”"People in the city are bold and dare to do anything, unlike us country bumpkins who are afraid of this and that. We have to learn from them. In this day and age, the timid would starve to death, and the bold would be stuffed to death.”"Where did you hear that again?”"What? Is there something wrong with that?" "There's nothing wrong with being wrong. After all, we still have to be careful. If we lose money in business, it's not a matter of a penny or two. I'm afraid we'll fall into a bottomless pit and it'll be difficult for us to jump out in this lifetime.”"Look at you. I was just saying that I wanted to learn from the people in the city. I haven't even finished speaking, and you're already backing out. Otherwise, I'll say that you scholars are talented and rebellious. It's rare for someone like you to do something decent in your life.”Zheng Qinglan felt a little dissatisfied when she heard her belittle herself again. She said,""You can talk, but what can you do? You still stay at home. At most, you can help others and earn some money.”"That's why I said we can't stay at home. Home is a well. How big can we see from the well? Only by going out could one find an opportunity. Once there was an opportunity, one had to hold it tightly in one's hand. Once one let go, it would become someone else's opportunity.”"Alright, let's see what kind of opportunity you can get.”"You're a grown man. I don't want to criticize you, but all you do is stay in the house and write. What's your goal? Once I say that I have to seize the opportunity, you'll climb up the pole, as if you're afraid that I'll go back on my word and want to tie me down. You're a man, the head of the family, but you want a woman to charge into the battle. Let me tell you, as long as there is a chance, I will definitely grab it. I will definitely not let it slip away. Even if I can't grab it, I will ask it to leave something for me. I can't let it slip away from my hands for nothing. Otherwise, I will regret it to death.”"I have no interest in doing business. You take your chance, I'll write my stuff, and we won't interfere with each other. What do you think?”"It's settled then. I don't believe that I'm doing worse than others.”
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